It was “Geese” frontman and Brooklyn’s favorite introvert, Cameron Winter, who was first photographed with global superstar Olivia Rodrigo in Los Angeles this past week. The images that surfaced online sparked dating rumors across the internet, marking the birth of social media’s new favorite ship.
Of course, it wouldn’t be long before the Drivers License singer and Brooklyn’s Princess Diana would be forced to comment on their recent night out with one another.
Rodrigo, whilst out on a coffee run in Los Feliz, remained silent during a paparazzi run up. However, it was Winter who was unexpectedly outspoken about the pictures.
“This is all due to the dangerous power of Photoshop,” stated Winter while guzzling down animal fries in an In N Out on the corner of Sunset and Highland.
This news came as a shock to our Bacon reporters, nicknamed “streethogs”.
Winter added that the image was doctored by X user @xenophiliuslovegood, later stating that the real man photographed with Rodrigo was none other than Danhausen, the very nice, very evil WWE superstar.
When asked about that night, Danhausen chose to forego any questions about his date, instead admitting to placing a curse on Cameron Winter.
The curse led to Winter transforming, Lost Highway style, into Julian Casablancas, lead singer of the alternative rock band “The Strokes”.
While this may seem like Danhausen did Winter a favor, the “Geese” frontman turned “The Strokes” frontman, but still “Geese” frontman just in the body of “The Strokes” frontman, that’s David Lynch for you, will now have to perform to twice as many pretentious, natty ice drinking, college dropouts for the rest of his life.
Olivia Rodrigo’s new album, You Seem Pretty Sad for a Girl So in Love, comes out on June 12, 2026, with features from no artists other than Danhausen and his friendhausens.
WPU Beacon Editor in Chief, Matt Goldman, who attended Wrestlemania Night 1, is sure to be excited for his favorite wrestler being featured on an album being released on his favorite male satirical editor, Jason Hook’s, birthday.
Of course, we won’t know Goldman’s exact thoughts on the upcoming album until he finally escapes from O’Hare International Airport.
