Why you shouldn’t be so open about your goals
March 8, 2020
As college students, I assume we all have some type of goals we want to achieve and if you don’t, it’s not a bad idea to start thinking of them.
A goal can be to get good grades in all your classes, to pass a test or to be more involved. Other goals outside of school can be becoming financially stable or taking care of our health, make diet and exercise a priority.
Some of us have bigger goals and dreams such as buying your dream car, travel the world or maybe write a book one day. Whether its big or small, setting a goal is good to do since it provides a sense of purpose, clarity, direction and control over your future.
If your anything like me, your main instinct when we set a goal is to run and tell someone about it.
When you think about it, it makes sense. Maybe your excited about this new journey you’re about to go on and want to share it. Maybe you want someone to hold you accountable to make sure those steps to achieve those goals get done.
However, researchers conclude that telling someone else your goals may not be the best idea.
By telling someone your goal, it gives you a sense of feeling that you already accomplished it and will make you less likely to put in the work to achieve it. After all, we all love the approval and self-identity we gain from others.
When someone hears your goals you are working on, we get that “good for you” praise as if we already achieved it. The praise makes you feel satisfied and makes you become less motivated to do the steps that are necessary.
Peter Gollwitzer, a psychology professor at New York University, conducted a study on the gap between intentions and results. He found that when people have their intentions acknowledged, they acted less compared to those who had intentions that were not acknowledged acted more.
We can also get the opposite response where those that we trust in telling our goals to, end up crushing them and make us rethink and second guess ourselves. Also, have you ever heard the phrase, “I’ll believe it when I see it?”
These people are telling you are not capable of achieving your dream and trust me it hurts. This should never happen and if it does, it should be your extra push of motivation to prove them wrong.
Honestly, I am sick of hearing people question my goals, so I stopped talking about them. If you don’t tell people, they won’t know. Therefore, they will not express their opinion.
I achieve goals for my personal satisfaction, and you should too. If you are excited to tell someone about it, save yourself the trouble and tell them after you completed it. That satisfaction will feel great knowing you earned it.
If you cannot wait, express your goals in a way that is not going to give you that satisfying feeling.