Central Jersey Now A “Thing”

Central Jersey

Yuletide Carole, 265 Days Until Xmas

In one of his first major legislative actions as governor of New Jersey, Phil Murphy has officially recognized Central Jersey, with a capital C, as a valid area of the garden state.

The piece of legislation, which was passed on February 29th of this year, states that “the area between North and South Jersey is a thing. Central Jersey exists.”

“I think this is one of the biggest problems plaguing New Jersey and I’m glad I was able to fix the number 1 priority plaguing the state,” Murphy said. No one word yet on his solution to fix high taxes and potholes.

One aspect of the legislation that has many NJ residents confused is the exact area designated as Central Jersey. Apparently, there were disagreements as to what exactly is constituted as Central Jersey. The general consensus was that anything between Morris and Monmouth counties (Hunterdon, Somerset, Union, Middlesex, and Mercer) is Central Jersey. However, some argue that counting Morris county is too high. Others argue that Ocean County should also be included.

The piece of legislation came about after years of arguing between people who live in the Central Jersey area and everyone else. New Jersey residents couldn’t come to consensus if the area should actually be labeled “Central Jersey.”

The law doesn’t officially draw out the area of Central Jersey, with Governor Murphy saying, “If you think it’s Central Jersey, it probably is.”

Many people who had been advocating for the recognition of Central Jersey are excited by this new law.

“Finally the best part of the state is recognized and no one can fight me,” says Lilly Raftopoulos, Central Jersey lobbyist. Raftopoulos, who feels passionately about the subject, often stands on tables and goes on tirades about the subject. “This is the end of the standing on tables rage.”

Still, others don’t agree with the legislation at all.

“Trenton and Six Flags are the only things in Central Jersey. Everything else is north or south,” says WPU senior Whitney Wu.

A counter legislation was also proposed to split New Jersey into only two parts, North and South Jersey.

“I’m just saying, there’s a clear way to distinguish which part of Jersey you’re from. Everyone’s favorite breakfast meat. If you say the correct term, ‘Taylor ham,’ you’re from North Jersey. If you say ‘pork roll,’ you’re wrong and you’re from South Jersey,” said Chris P. Bacon, a state legislator.

Other distinguishing factors would be if you say sub or hoagie, which sports team you root for, and whether you’re a BENNY or not.

While many New Jersey residents are excited about this new law, out-of-state residents don’t see the importance.

“Dude, I’m from New York. I really don’t care,” says Beacon editor-in-chief, Ryan Doyle.