Our University’s President Billy the Bear has finally reemerged from hibernation and The Bacon has quite the exclusive interview to share with you our Pioneers![*honk*]
So, let’s get it into [*honk*] and get an insight into the beary interesting mind of the head of our stellar school. [*honk*]
How would you rate your first year as university president?
Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but… It’s been great! Ha did I get you there. [*growl*] I would say it’s been a good year. The rest of the critters have been roaming free without fear, nature has been able to flourish, Dr. Gaggle has been working on some new research and so much more!
Would you say you’ve achieved [*honk*] all points of your three-point plan you claimed to work on to improve campus life?
[*Growl*] I would say I got all that done. There are now salmon and honey-based dishes at the dining hall, I created a critters squad to meet the needs of all critters in need on campus and the dorms well… many of the animals didn’t take a liking to it and decided to roam and live outside.
What do you have to say about [*honk*] your bee labgate scandal last year?
I have no idea what you [*growl*] you’re talking about. I would never do such a thing as sneak into the bee labs. I mean who would want to have a taste of such sweet and yummy honey [*growl*] anyways.
Sweet and yummy? are you implying [*honk*] you’ve tasted it?
[*Growl*] I am not I just have an eye for good honey when I see it.
What are your plans to keep the life of the campus’s critters and animals unbothered by the humans this fall? [*honk*]
I’ve been in discussion with Vice President Finn Owlet and will send out a web letter with the help of Charlotte sometime in April.
Finally any last words for the critters on campus?
Anything is pawsible! [*growl*]